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Wednesday, May 23, 2012


In response to "Lesbian chic" from two days ago, a commenter said:

"Speaking as a woman, I can always tell the masculine partner with my gaydar, but not the female one.....The former never like me for some reason. I think they see me as a threat, even though I have no interest in their partners."

I was surprised to hear that from a woman, since I had assumed lesbian resentment was aimed strictly at men. Before I can even open my mouth I sometimes sense that they're brimming over with hostility towards me.

I'm never sure exactly why this is so. Do they hate all men? Do they hate me simply because they assume that I'll dislike them because they're lesbians? Have I somehow communicated distaste for them? Do they resent me because they see me as the type of guy who never expressed any interest in them when they were in high school? Do they see me as competition?

If they hate me simply because I'm a guy, is it an instinctive competitive hatred or is it a result of all the propaganda they've imbibed about our patriarchal society?

One of the striking things about this animosity is that it seems to be expressed most strongly by the same set of women who decry sexism with great bitterness. They assume that all males dislike and look down upon females simply because they're females. Yet they do the exact same thing to males, and they do it far more overtly.

I've never known a guy who automatically stuck up for all men over all women, in every situation, no matter who was at fault. Yet I seem to have known a fair number of women who will just automatically side with a woman over a man in every single case, even when the woman involved is an obvious sociopath.

You might almost call their attitude sexist. 


Anonymous said...

I used to be really good friends with a girl who was lesbian and she and her partner had no problem with me, but they were the types of lesbians who would also date men. If anything they seemed to get along with guys but be attracted to women. Admittedly, girls like them are uncommon, but I don't think it's lesbians who necessarily are anti-men I think it's just simply feminists. It's feminists that are irrational. Lesbians just have a different sexual orientation... I think the confusion just comes from so many feminists also being lesbians.

John Craig said...

Anonymous --
You make a good point. The lesbians I've met who are friendly to guys I've liked quite a bit; I've found that they tend to be more logical than most women.

But yes, most feminists and most lesbians are interchangeable in their mindsets, and the overlap is pretty big.