Zion Cross. Isn't that an oxymoron?
Cincier Holmes. Sherlock's earnest brother.
LaCarr Trent. Mr. Trent can run 60 meters in 7.01, which makes him about as fast as Renault's Le Car was.
JaMicah Polk. How Usain Bolt's countrymen pronounce the name of their island.
Laquavious Ford. He must get a lot of email addressed to "Loquacious," since that's what his name Autocorrects to.
Zavier Johnson. The power of Phonics.
Naim Muhammad. Isn't that a little like naming your child John Middle Initial Smith?
Khance Meyers, Chantz Sawyers. Will employers give those two a chance?
Ojay Gibson. Mr. Gibson is a senior, which means he was born around 1999, four years after the Trial of the Century ended. By that point, of course, it was obvious to any unbiased parent-to-be that Mr. Simpson was innocent.
Prince Gaye. Think he takes any grief for that name?
Shaton Vaughn. He shat on his competition.
Champion Allison. His foresighted parents knew he would run 200 meters in 21.19.
Igo Grimes. He has a robust self-image.
Junior Desir. His son could be Junior Desir, Junior.
Dontavian Smith. Don't even think about it.
Quazier Dailey. His suburban opponents feel a little queasier when they see his name.
Roman Turner. Instead of naming their son Cassius or Marcellus or Octavious, his parents settled on a more generic alternative.
Willesley Lindo. One of the Seven Sisters. Sorta.
Kaiser Giddie. Good thing his last name isn't Wilhelm.
Zakharee Williams. A free-spirited Zachary.
War'Vreunta Moore. My favorite; I honestly can't think of anything to say about it.
Sha'Carri Richardson. Were her parents thinking of a baton, or a gun?
Derria Edwards. That part of the anatomy helps one sprint faster.
Serena Clark. Her parents are still hoping she'll take up tennis.
Lyn-Nikka Vance. Be careful with that pronunciation.
Armoni Brown. Were her parents thinking more in terms of harmony, our money, or Giorgio?
Zy'Shai Brown, Iantha Wright, Zaire Chest, Nyjah Young-Bey, Shante Robinson, T'Aja Cameron. If someone offered you 1000 to 1 odds, would you be willing to take the bet that any of these girls were white?
Karimah Davis. Don't know about Ms. Davis, but karma's a bitch.
Myann Davidson. Not your Ann.
Destiny Pennington, Destini Pickens, Destini Jeter. Their parents were fatalists.
Hava Turner. Please, I insist.
Shaianne Sipsey. They were a fierce tribe.
Masai Russell. Ditto.
Mariya Hudson. Ave Mariya!
Tiler Tyler. Sometimes a little asymmetry is preferable.
Kamry Brown, Camari Griffin. Brought to you by Toyota.
Shauntezz-Marie Austin. Her parents couldn't quite decide which ethnicity to go with.
O'Shayla Muldrow. Who says the Irish can't sprint?