Search Box

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Interview with Hillary Clinton on Fifty Shades of Grey

Just Not Said was lucky enough to obtain an audience with Hillary Clinton, so we decided to ask about her reaction to the new hit movie.

JNS: Fifty Shades of Grey just set an all time record for Presidents' Day weekend with a box office of $95 million. What do you make of this?

HC: Honestly, I expected to hate this movie. I really did. And I tried to. But once I started watching, me a convert. I now understand why the book is so popular.

JNS. But don't you think you should be showing more solidarity with the sisterhood? By maybe calling for a boycott or something?

HC: Don't be silly. Why would we want to boycott something that makes us feel so good?

JNS: But isn't the underlying message that a woman has to be dependent on a man for money and power and prestige? What does that do to the psyches of young girls?

HC: Who cares? And c'mon, realistically, where would I be if I hadn't married Bill? Do you honestly think they're paying me two hundred grand per speech because I graduated from Wellesley?

JNS: Early reports are that 68% of the viewing audience for the movie are women. Do women really want to be dominated by a man like that?

HC: Well, yes. Unless they're lesbians or something.

JNS: That's a little shocking given your previous statements on gender politics.

HC: Puh-leeze. To be a helpless quivering mass while some man explores the depths of your, uh, soul…Let's face it, that's what life is all about.

JNS: But didn't the lack of a coherent plot line and the lame dialogue bother you at all?

HC: You really think I care about that stuff when Jamie Dornan is on the screen? Ohhh my….(HC fans herself with her hand.)

JNS: You have a longstanding reputation for never giving a straight answer, for always sidestepping questions. It's a little surprising you're so direct about this movie.

HC: I'm a changed woman, I really am. I mean, I still intend to run for President and all. But if I win, I plan to convert the Lincoln Bedroom into a private dungeon where Bill and I can act out all of our secret fantasies.

JNS: That brings us to another topic: isn't this movie sort of rape porn?

HC: Yeah, I know it goes against my feminist principles, but I now realize that women were meant to be dominated, and, let's face it, subjugated.

JNS: Well, good luck with your Presidential run.

HC: Thank you. Hey, what other movies has Jamie Dornan appeared in?


Anonymous said...

john clearly you suffer from a classic case of projection. what is wrong with you man.
you want to be tied up by james dornan and become a quivering mass of whatever....

stop putting your filthy desires into the great hillary's mouth!!! Everybody knows she wants to be james dornan, not anastasia steele!!!! You filthy jew slanderer!!! Who worked at Government sachs!!

Anonymous said...

btw you should watch borat. he's a really evil parody and joke on the left.
people think he's mocking the stupid russians of some place. but basically its sacha baron cohen, an ashkenazi jew making dumb polack jokes for 2 hours. it's really really cruel. he rips aparts the gays as well in bruno john.

new lesson - if a jew does it, he isn't a right wing nutjob, he's a great comedian!!

i confess it pisses me off that so much western bullshit like affirmative action and diversity quotas and family laws are being blindly imported into my countyr.

what do you think of the cultural marxism conspiracy theory john? does it seem reasonable to you?

John Craig said...

Anon --
Okay, you got me dead to rights…..

I have seen Borat, as well as Bruno. Yes, Cohen is cruel, but that's what makes him so funny. I've been a fan of his since the Ali G days, back when he used to mock political correctness by pretending to be a rapper and then acting incredibly stupid, and showing how much he could get away with by having people think they were (possibly) dealing with a black.

I agree about Borat: Cohen would encourage anti-Semitism, then when he could finally wheedle some anti-Semitism out of someone (by pretending to be anti-Semitic himself), he would basically point at it and say, see, aha, the world really is anti-Semitic. In fact, it's behavior like that more than anything else which actually does encourage anti-Semitism.

That said, Borat was hilarious, and so was Bruno (which was a more thinly veiled jab at the Jews' enemies, since he made Bruno Austrian). And yes, if it had been a conservative Christian who had mocked gays so mercilessly, the media would have been up in arms.

What country do you live in?

I'm not sure exactly what you mean by the cultural Marxism conspiracy theory, I've never heard of that as a "conspiracy theory." As far as cultural Marxism, it's just another phrase for political correctness, which translates as factual incorrectness.

Steven said...

anonymous, they're not dumb Polak jokes...he's British- all our stupid jokes are about the Irish, not the Poles. I bet the 'dumb Polak' concept wouldn't have even occurred to him. Borat is from Kazakhstan, not even Russia.

John, you know the black comedian Patrice O'Neal? Check this out, its related to the topic of the post:

If you like that, here he is criticising pc weakness of white guys:

But if you like him enough to check out a show, watch 'elephant in the room' as the rest of the above isn't so good.

Mark Caplan said...

I thought Anonymous might be John Craig himself parodying how Hillary's rabid defenders use ad hominem muggings to slime her critics.

John Craig said...

Steven --
Anon was saying they were Polack jokes in the sense that Jewish people always make fun of their enemies, and the origin of "How many Polacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb" and the like are Jewish people who are originally from Poland who hated Poles.

Yes, Patrice O'Neal was great. You would have enjoyed watching him at the Friars Club roast of Mike Tyson (I rarely watch those, but was curious to see that one because it was of Tyson). He got up to the dais after several white comedians had made fun of Tyson (who took it very well), and said, "You know, I don't know if I like the fact that white people have gotten so….comfortable with Mike Tyson."

John Craig said...

Mark --
Sorry, not me.

But you're right about what Hillary's defenders do, and in fact, everybody on the Left does it. I think it's impossible to have an argument twits any of them without them resorting to ad hominem attacks.

(I don't put comments in as anyone other than myself, the only time I've done that is when a friend has sent me an email about a post, and I ask if they mind if I stick that in as a comment.)

Anonymous said...

yeah totally agree. patrice o neal like so many black comedians is viciously truthful, especially about women. so is bill burr in a different way. he does a great riff on "gold digging whores" ala tiger woods and arnold's mistresses.

i'm indian.. the post modernism of the academy is proceeding grandly a pace over here, sad to say.
there's a bunch of guys starting with william lind and larry auster who go on about the frankfurt school, and gramsci and cultural marxism. it sounds bizarrely unbelievable but they've been right about a fair amount so far. so i'm on the fence about whether to believe them. david horowitz, father of horowitz the venture capitalist is an exponent as well.

John Craig said...

Anon --
Yes, cultural Marxism is all about obfuscation, and propaganda. Has nothing to do with trying to get to the truth of things, everything to do with enforcing a certain worldview in which truly critical thinking -- as opposed to what they call critical thinking -- is discouraged. Women are the same as men, one culture is as good as another, etc, etc.

Sorry to hear it's made so much progress in India.

Steven said...

The Kazakhs probably aren't specifically an enemy of the Jews (are they?) but I grant you he was certainly making fun of anti-antisemitism. So in that sense I see what you mean. Remember the song 'throw the Jews down the well' that he got a room full of Americans to sign along to?

That was the Charlie Sheen roast but of course everyone roasts the whole panel so Tyson would have been getting roasted by them all.

John Craig said...

Steven --
Just looked it up, you're right, it was the Charlie Sheen roast. My mistake.

No, the Kazakhs specifically are not particular enemies of the Jews, but they are mostly Muslim, so….

I heard once that Cohen originally wanted to make the Borat movie about an Albanian, but then he found out that the Albanians mint exact retribution, so he changed his character to a relatively harmless, more obscure ethnicity.

Steven said...


Critical theory might have gone in the direction of what we now call cultural Marxism but I don't think that was the original intention of the Frankfurt school.

Those dudes were proper Marxists, not the pc police. They wanted eventually to transition to socialism but they wanted to explain why it hadn't happened yet with reference to culture (if I remember correctly) and they wanted an alternative path of social development that didn't lead to soviet socialism, which they were critical of.

Steven said...

John, I heard the same thing but I had forgotten it was Albania. That perhaps indicates he had decided on a Muslim nationality and wanted to depict them as backward and crudely antisemitic. He was pretty brutal.

I always remember when as Ali G, he asked a politician whether he got caned in school and the guy was saying yes, all the time. Caning was a traditional British corporal punishment but had evolved to mean heavily stoned, which the politician didn't realise.

John Craig said...

Steven --
I actually thought he was much more impressive as Ali G, that was all done live, as opposed to his movies, which were mostly scripted. And two of his movies, Talladega Nights and The Dictator, were pretty lame.