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Saturday, January 28, 2017

A fat Peter Greene

Every time I see a picture of Donald Trump, the thought goes through my head, that guy really needs to lose some weight. There's a faintly piggish aspect to his face, and, given how the media has in the recent past focused on his piggish attitude toward women, it would behoove him to lose 30 pounds:

Granted, Trump could cure cancer, harness the power of the oceans for unlimited free energy, and bring world peace, all in one day, and the media would barely mention it. They'd prefer to focus on something insensitive he said instead.

But, he should still lose weight. I've heard it said that when he was young he was good-looking. I don't quite see it:

His bone structure is perfectly fine, and there are no real flaws to his face. But even then, he had a soft, self-satisfied look that rendered him unappealing.

It occurred to me recently that if the young Trump had lost a lot of weight, he'd have looked somewhat like actor Peter Greene. You probably don't know Greene by name, but you'd recognize him from two of his more famous roles, in The Usual Suspects --

-- and Pulp Fiction:

Greene is skinny, with a feral, haunted, contemptuous expression. He exudes coldness and ill will, and he's unmistakably Anglo, both of which combine to give him a look Hollywood loves to cast in villainous roles.

And he's what Trump would, or would have, looked like had he ever gotten down to 160 pounds.

Viewed the other way, Trump is what Peter Greene would look like if he were force fed until he gained 80 pounds, and were hypnotized into believing that he was the absolute best at everything he'd ever done.

Frankly, we don't want another skinny, wimpy President. We want a guy who'll throw his weight around, both with Congress and with business leaders who are considering moving operations abroad.

Just, maybe, 20 or 30 pounds less weight.

I know, I should be concerned with more substantive issues, like how Trump's phone call with Putin went, or how the country is now progressing on the jobs front.

But, somehow, this is more fun.


Anonymous said...

I didn't know him by name, but, I remember it was in the news that the actor who played Zed in PULP FICTION was arrested for buying crack cocaine. And I think it was "buying on the street," even, if memory serves (giving rise to the thought, what is the point in being in movies, if you have to buy dope in a desperate, unsafe, out of control manner, just like any random nobody...But I digress)

So yeah, if we can just get the new President to smoke crack cocaine too, he may well slim down like that movie actor...We can call crack THE PETER GREENE DIET...I bet Putin knows where to get some high quality crack cocaine as well, he probably smokes crack before he takes his shirt off and wrestles tigers and all of those other vigorous pastimes we see him doing in various photographs...
====Fake Baba

John Craig said...

Fake Baba --
Yes, Greene has struggled with drug addiction for most of his adult life. I originally had something about that in the post, but then took it out, thinking it was sort of irrelevant. But you're right -- the cocaine diet WORKS. The pictures I used of Greene, though, are from roughly 20 years ago, and he looks a lot worse now, and it's not just the worse we all get as we age.

I see Putin as more the steroids or human growth hormone type, though I'm sure he wouldn't get his off the street. Putin would get the best of everything -- drugs, dachas, dames. (I know, "dames" is awfully old-fashioned, but I was trying to be alliterative.)

jova said...

excellent observation. Wonder what Trump would look like if he hit the gym and took steroids to get pumped up.

John Craig said...

Jova --
Dolph Lundgren.

Steven said...

He always reminds me of one of the Sheens. Compare this pic of young Trump, looking quite handsome, and the following one of Emilio Estevez:

John Craig said...

Steven --
Honestly, I always thought Emilio Esteves had a soft look to him too, I never saw him as good-looking either.