Aspergers support groups say that Aspergers is an organic condition, one that no one chooses to have, and is therefore worthy of sympathy.
They're right, of course. And when we see people with other organic conditions -- such as cerebral palsy, or multiple sclerosis -- we feel sympathy.
The problem with Aspergers, though, is that it is not visible at first, and it only becomes apparent when one realizes how hypocritical, rigid, egocentric, and prone to meltdowns someone is.
In other words, it is an organic disorder which largely mimics a character disorder (narcissism).
Imagine, for one moment, that there was a congenital defect which people had no control over, and which caused them to punch you in the face every time they saw you.
After seeing them, and getting socked in the nose, would your natural reaction be, "Oh, you poor thing?"
Of course not. And that's not how most of us react to Aspies, either. We want to punch back (verbally).
It'd be a lot easier to sympathize with people with Aspergers if there were some visible, physical manifestation of their condition, say, an indentation on their foreheads to let us know their brains were lacking. But there's not, and the process of finding out what their personalities are like -- and finally figuring out the root cause -- is usually so infuriating that the window for sympathy has passed by the time the realization dawns.
Sometimes I think it would be better for Aspies to just say, upon initially meeting people, that they have Aspergers Syndrome, and maybe even semi-apologize in advance for it. This way people would be far more likely to make allowances for them. But, of course, this would also cause others to just immediately write them off, so Aspies don't do that.
And others have to find out the slow way, as described above.