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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Nice women, average women, and sociopaths (IV)

Most of the situations described in the previous posts in this series could apply to both men and women, so the standard male pronoun was used. The following situations, however, apply primarily to women.

Situation: How do you feel about getting plastic surgery?

Nice woman: Would be too embarrassed to get it. Has always had the vague feeling that it's somehow immoral, though she would never express that opinion.

Average woman: Gets her eyelids done at 46 and has a face lift at 60. Confides to a few close friends that she had the work done. Feels a mild moral superiority to women who get breast implants.

Sociopath: Has a nose job at age 20, double D breast implants at 23, a chin implant at 25, and liposuction at 26. Starts Botox at age 36, gets her first face lift at age 40, and gets them every four or five years thereafter. Old high school acquaintances barely recognize her, but she adamantly insists that she has never had any work done.

Situation: How does a girl lose her virginity?

Nice girl: A college classmate takes her to an expensive restaurant, she feels guilty about it, and doesn't want him to be unhappy, so gives in. This establishes a lifelong pattern: she tends to let men determine the time and place. She has no instinctive feel for how to seduce a man, though she eventually learns how to deflect unwanted passes. 

Average girl: Loses it at a high school party while drunk, partly just because she figures it's high time to do so, and doesn't want to be the last virgin among her friends. Her life thereafter is a gradual process of discovering what she enjoys, and becoming more uninhibited about sex in general.

Sociopath: She plots to lose her virginity with a popular and handsome older boy at her high school. Arranges a "study date" with him, then seduces him, then uses him to enhance her own social standing at school. This establishes a lifelong pattern in which she uses sex to achieve other ends. Sometimes she enjoys sex for its own sake, but mostly she likes the power it gives her over men. She uses it for influence, money, and even revenge. Develops into classic femme fatale. Always disparages her previous lovers to her current ones.

Situation: A friend confides that she is having an affair.

Nice woman: Is shocked, not sure what to think. Simultaneously happy for her friend and sorry for her husband. Assumes that this type of thing happens much less frequently than it does. Keeps the secret.

Average woman: Is tickled by the knowledge, wants to know what the guy is like in bed, thinks about how she would like to have an affair too. Tells only one mutual friend, and swears her to secrecy.

Sociopath: If she has had affairs herself, she pooh-poohs her friend's choice of partner and tells her she could do better, knowing that this will diminish her enjoyment. If the sociopath has not attracted suitors, she acts outraged, and tells her friend that if she doesn't end it immediately she will inform her husband. Actually feels self-righteous about this, as she attributes her lack of affairs to her superior morality rather than her lack of opportunity. After her friend ends the affair, the sociopath eventually tells numerous people about it anyway, swearing each to secrecy so as to cover her own tracks. She also tells the story a number of times without mentioning her (by now ex-) friend's name, but emphasizing her own role in it, so as to highlight her own saintliness.

Situation: A guy is impotent with you.

Nice woman: Feels sympathetic because he so obviously is mortified, but doesn't really know what to say, so just says it's okay, really.

Average woman: Tells him it's no big deal, that she's fine with it. Knows that acting sympathetic is the best way to coax a better performance out of him the next time.

Sociopath: If out to gain something from him, tells him that just being around him is better than having sex with most guys. If she was only looking for casual sex, she scoffs at him and asks if he's sure he doesn't prefer men.

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